The process of solving a problem goes more quickly and is far more effective if you  are able to keep people and problems separate.  As simple as this may sound, it’s difficult for many of us to do because often times we think that the people are the problem, so we attack the package deal. …

  Part of our interpersonal success is tied to saying the right thing at the right time.  But an even larger part of that success is tied to our being able to avoid saying the wrong thing at the tempting moment.  There are times when we so want to tell somebody off or give them a…

Earning Respect Many people go through life thinking they’re entitled to be respected by those around them and then they whine when they don’t receive it.  What these people fail to understand is that respect is not something you’re entitled to, it’s something that must be earned through action.  And the quickest way to earn it…

You Cared If someone appears to be down, take the time to build them back up.  Go to them and say something like, “You seem kind of down today, is everything all right?”  Then be prepared to listen to what they have to say and look for ways in which you can help lighten their…

Listening It’s hard for most of us to fathom, but those around us really don’t want to hear us talk about ourselves.  At the same time, they’re dying to tell their story to someone who cares.  True leaders understand this.  They realize that talking about themselves is not going to improve the performance of their…

Personally Touched “Touchy-feely” is a condescending term used to put down management tools that openly focus on people and meeting their needs.  The connotation is that such tools are somehow grossly inferior to the more common hard-nosed managemen tools that use fear as a motivator and ignore people’s needs.  What touchy-feely really means is that…

Rewrite Your Script A friend of mine once told me, “If you don’t like the play, step off the stage and rewrite the script.”  This wisdom is particularly useful for dealing with bad days.  Instead of whining or playing the victim, step back, take a deep breath, and say to yourself, “I’m going to rewrite the rest…

The Right Thing Doing the right thing makes you look good and it energizes those around.  Often we are faced with situations where we ask ourselves, “Should I do the right thing or take the easy way out?” I was on a Hertz Rental Car bus not long ago at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport.  A…

The Golden Rule Treating others the way you want to be treated is often referred to as the Golden Rule.  The reason it’s called the Golden Rule is that it has such a high payoff associated with it.  People absolutely crave to be treated with kindness and respect.  So, when you treat them this way,…