Compliments Are Gifts and It’s Important to Thank the Giver

Many people have a hard time accepting compliments. When you tell one of these people that they look great, they brush off your compliment with something like, “Yeah, right!” Or, “I think you need a new pair of glasses.” Similarly, if you compliment them on something they’ve done, they come back with, “Any idiot could have done what I did.” Such behavior borders on rudeness. It tells the person paying you the compliment that either they have no taste, or you don’t value their opinion–both of which make that person feel badly. If you’re in this type of behavior pattern and want to get out, you first need to understand what a compliment is: it’s a gift from another person that’s intended to make you feel good. Second, accept it as such and respond in a manner that makes the giver feel good as well. All this requires is that you look at the other person, smile and say something like, “Thank you. You just made my day.” Or, “Thank you. What you just said means a lot to me.” When you do this, you’ll not only make that other person’s day, but your day will be much brighter as well.

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