Karina Bland wrote a column which appeared in The Arizona Republic about how to apologize in which she referenced a book written by Donna Moriarty titled, Not Just Words: How a Good Apology Makes You Braver, Boulder and Better at Life. According to the column, “Apologizing takes courage, which is why we often avoid it even when we know it’s the right thing to do.” Ms. Moriarty suggests that we think of an apology as having four steps:
- Admit that you’ve harmed the person by saying or doing something you shouldn’t have.
- Express it face-to-face and use the words, “I’m sorry.”
- Fix the situation by doing whatever is necessary to make things right.
- Change your behavior so this doesn’t happen again.
As Ms. Moriarty put it, “It’s never really easy, but it’s worth it. You almost invariably feel better and you invariably have a better relationship with the person afterward.” To which Ms. Bland adds, “There might even be a hug in it.”
